Every December, studios throw everything at the wall trying to be your new holiday comfort watch. Meanwhile, Hallmark is off in its own snow globe, serving the same audience a thousand slightly different movies and loving it. This list is for the other stuff — the wild, the wonky, the 'how did this get made' Christmas movies and specials that stuck with me for all the weirdest reasons. It isn’t in any particular order... except the final pick, which absolutely earns the crown. And no, I’m not diving into Hallmark’s vault — you’d have to Clockwork Orange me to make that happen.
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A Christmas Carol with Jim Carrey (2009)
People tend to forget this one exists, probably because its mo-cap animation sits squarely in that post-Polar Express uncanny valley. Jim Carrey goes full one-man band here — he’s Scrooge and all three ghosts: a flickering candle of a Past, a jolly Present who looks suspiciously like he could sell you a Whopper, and the classic Grim Reaper Future. Robert Zemeckis wrote and directed (again), and it leans hard into the old-school horror roots of Dickens’ story — very in line with the UK tradition of ghost stories at Christmas.
The cast is stacked: Gary Oldman, Colin Firth, Bob Hoskins, Cary Elwes, and Robin Wright. But the character designs are unnerving enough that even the theatrical poster — Scrooge riding a bell with his mouth agape — lives rent-free in my brain. For context, Carrey was already holiday royalty after 2000’s live-action Grinch, which still bangs.
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We Wish You a Turtle Christmas (1994)
If the animation in entry one freaks you out, the live-action Turtles here might send you running. This direct-to-video oddity follows the ninja dudes stumbling around NYC, dead eyes and rictus grins blazing, desperate to find a present for Splinter. Highlights (lowlights?) include Michelangelo randomly breaking into opera and Splinter’s 'Twelve Days of Christmas' list featuring... 12 April O’Neil autographs (yikes), 4 manhole covers (someone’s going to fall in), and 9 narrow neckties (for a giant rat, sure).
It piggybacks off the 'Coming Out of Their Shells' live tour and lifts a couple of songs. There are even real turtles wandering around green goo because the 90s had zero chill. Those costumes? Nightmare fuel in broad daylight.
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He-Man & She-Ra: A Christmas Special (1985)
Yes, the cartoons were originally glorified toy ads. Yes, I still love them. This 45-ish-minute special exists to mash both casts together and toss two Earth kids into Eternia after Orko biffs a spaceship demo during Adam and Adora’s birthday. The kids explain Christmas, Horde Prime orders it stopped, and suddenly Skeletor and Hordak are jockeying for villain-of-the-year with gift-wrapped chaos.
In a twist, Skeletor lands temporary child-and-robot-dog duty (the dog’s name is Relay and he yaps adorably) and starts catching feelings — much to his disgust. Miguel and Alicia thank him like he’s not a shrieking skull man with a gym body, and by the end, he even helps save them from Horde Prime.
"But I don’t like to feel good, I like to feel evil."
The kids go home, Santa swings by, and Eternian tech gifts that would absolutely get an Earth child sucked into a jet engine are handed out with a smile. It’s ridiculous. It’s fantastic.
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Smokey Mountain Christmas (1986)
I’m biased: I love Dolly Parton, and this TV movie is peak Dolly magic. She co-wrote it, supplied songs with her uncle, and plays Lorna Davis — basically 'Dolly, the beleaguered superstar' — who hides out in a mountain cabin and finds seven orphans living there. Enter Mountain Dan (Lee Majors), the woodsman with a heart of gold, and Jezebel (Anita Morris), a redheaded backwoods witch who tries to Snow White her with a poisoned pie.
Also in the mix: Bo Hopkins, John Ritter, and Dan Hedaya. It aired on ABC in December ’86, ends with Lorna adopting all seven kids, and lets Dolly be Dolly — wholesome, funny, and formidable. It’s a delight. And yeah, pairing her with Elvira as the witch would have melted TV screens, but we can dream.
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A Christmas Dream (1984)
Mr. T and Emmanuel Lewis were omnipresent in the 80s, so NBC built a holiday variety special around them. Lewis plays Billy (not Webster, but come on), a kid who hates Christmas, and Mr. T does a Santa-adjacent mentor routine to win him over. It’s set all over NBC’s New York offices and crams in guests: David Copperfield, Willie Tyler and Lester, The Rockettes, Maureen McGovern, the American Boys Choir, and figure skaters Tai Babilonia and Randy Gardner.
Frank Slocum — who wrote a bunch of Copperfield specials and beauty pageants — penned it, which explains the 'grab whoever’s available near 30 Rock' lineup. Ed Koch pops in too. It’s a time capsule with hairspray.
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The Life & Adventures of Santa Claus (1985)
Rankin/Bass, but not the one you remember. Adapted from L. Frank Baum’s 1902 book, this stop-motion tale gives Santa a seriously bonkers origin: an immortal wood spirit leaves baby Claus to be raised by a lioness, he grows up amid fair folk, and there’s a full-on war between evil Awgwas and benevolent immortals. Claus finds reindeer, figures out winter deliveries, nearly dies, and then a council of immortals grants him eternal life — and the name Santa — because he’s earned it.
It’s gorgeous and way stranger than the usual Rankin/Bass staples. Not as many famous voices, sure, but Earle Hyman — Panthro himself — plays King Awgwa, and that rules.
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Christmas Comes to Pac-Land (1982)
The early 80s belonged to Pac-Man, so of course ABC aired a Saturday morning cartoon and this holiday special. Marty Ingels voices Pac-Man with a gravelly charm, Santa crash-lands in Pac-Land, and the Pac family learns what Christmas is. Then the power pellets come out — for the reindeer — to get the sleigh back in the air. Subtle, it is not.
Bonus voice cred: Peter Cullen and Frank Welker — yes, Optimus Prime and Megatron — are in the cast. Saturday mornings used to be an event, and this is Exhibit A in neon.
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Santa Claus: The Movie (1985)
Before Tim Allen, there was Dudley Moore as Patch the elf, and a candy-crazed John Lithgow chewing scenery as villainous CEO BZ. Directed by Jeannot Szwarc (Jaws 2, Supergirl, Somewhere in Time), it sets up Santa’s origin as foretold by North Pole elves, then swerves into corporate satire when Patch’s factory automation misfires and he runs off to partner with BZ. The plan: sell unsafe, supercharged candy that makes kids float. What could go wrong?
Quite a bit, obviously — and it’s up to Santa, Patch, and a couple of kids to fix it. The Superman vibes are no accident; producer Ilya Salkind worked on those movies too. One eyebrow-raiser: Lithgow’s BZ eats the flying candy to escape and sails into the upper atmosphere, presumably to a very chilly ending, and everyone kind of shrugs.
Cast wins include David Huddleston (the Big Lebowski himself) as Santa, Burgess Meredith as an elf, and Peter O’Farrell for the fantasy nerds among us. It’s gloriously 80s. StudioCanal announced a 4K restoration in November, with Blu-ray and Digital on the way, and it looks slick.
Quick detour for two legends I met through Mystery Science Theater 3000: 'Santa Claus Conquers the Martians' (green-painted Martians kidnap Santa so their kids can have toys; character names like Momar, Bomar, and Dropo; tiny Pia Zadora as Girmar) and the 1959 Mexican oddity usually titled just 'Santa Claus' (aka 'Santa Claus vs. the Devil'). That second one features a devil named Pitch trying to corrupt kids, Santa’s 'child helpers' from around the world, robot reindeer, shout-outs to Baby Jesus and Merlin, a device called the Teletalker, and a very hairy Keymaker. It’s a delirious fever dream — the MST3K version is the way to go.
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Christmas at Pee-wee’s Playhouse (1988)
Paul Reubens took the classic TV holiday special and said 'watch this.' The regular Playhouse crew is here — Laurence Fishburne and William Marshall among them — with Jon Paragon as Jambi and Lynne Marie Stewart as Miss Yvonne. The moral is sweet and simple: Christmas isn’t about Pee-wee’s wrap-around-the-continent wish list; it’s about sharing and giving.
The guest list is bonkers in the best way: Charo, the Del Rubio Triplets, Frankie and Annette, Whoopi Goldberg, Magic Johnson, Joan Rivers, kd lang, Dinah Shore, Oprah, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Cher, Little Richard, and Grace Jones literally emerges from a shipping crate to do 'Little Drummer Boy.' It’s outrageous, heartfelt, and a gift that keeps giving.
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The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978)
The myth is real, and yes, there’s now a feature-length doc about it called 'A Disturbance in the Force.' George Lucas reportedly wanted every copy buried, and you understand why once you watch it. The plot (get Chewie home for Life Day) is just scaffolding for chaos: Chewbacca’s family only speaks in growls, and his spouse is performed by a man in a Wookiee suit; Art Carney sells Chewie’s dad, Itchy, a VR fantasy featuring Diahann Carroll; Bea Arthur runs the Mos Eisley Cantina and sings; Harvey Korman hosts a cooking segment in drag with multiple arms; there’s a full-on disco sequence; and Jefferson Starship performs because 1978.
In the middle of this, you get Boba Fett’s first-ever appearance in an animated sequence — the one part that actually works. Also, animated Han somehow looks like Adam Driver decades before Kylo Ren was a thing. Carrie Fisher closes it out singing as Leia, surrounded by glowing Wookiee orbs. She later said she was so high she couldn’t remember making it. Mark Hamill is wearing enough makeup to moonlight as a mannequin. Harrison Ford would rather not talk about it. I once mailed a copy and a homemade drinking game to Simon Pegg; consider that a cautionary tale, not a recommendation.
There you go: ten slices of festive weirdness to jolt your holiday watchlist awake. A bunch are floating around on physical media or YouTube. Tis the season — go enjoy the odd.